hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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