...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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