At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
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There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
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Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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