The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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