I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
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