Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
