this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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