tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
