Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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