where does the pee come out of this thing
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize