I'm eating all of the evidence.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I'm just crazy horny about you
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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