If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I just want to make out with him forever
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
