Me. At least after what I've been through.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize