Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Acid is not a monday night drug
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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