I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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