I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize