yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize