Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
