I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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