Tell her she can't have a vagina
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
