i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize
