You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Randomize
