I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Only a mothe r could love this liver
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
whose ass print is on the piano?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
