and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
