Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
