omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
