She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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