We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
You're like the curious george of whores
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
