Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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