you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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