how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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