Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
In America we eat man semen.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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