question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?