i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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