My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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