My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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