Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
