Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
