She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
