I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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