it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
