It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
