I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize