i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
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I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
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I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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