She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
