woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
