I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
