from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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