maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
