'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
