That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
