it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
